Rain and the Rhinoceros

And now, for some comic relief, thanks to my friend the wonderfully brilliant cartoonist Andy Singer.

Following Halden, I’ll offer a few of my own “theological confessions.”

I confess: I think the future of Roman Catholic theology lies in appropriating the fundamental insights of the Nouvelle Theologie.

I confess: I have a tendency to think much of official Catholic social thought is severely wrongheaded and mostly Constantinian.

I confess: I have a strong distaste for most forms of neo-Thomism (with the exception of Herbert McCabe).

I confess: With Halden, I also think Rowan Williams is the best theologian writing today.

I confess: I think that most theologians have no idea what the analogia entis is all about.

I confess: I think Hans Urs von Balthasar is far more radical than Karl Rahner ever dreamed.

I confess: I am not “emerging” or “emergent” and I have no idea what those terms mean.

I confess: I don’t understand all the hype about David Bentley Hart.

I confess: I think that much of mainline protestantism is the epitome of liberal capitalism.

I confess: I think Stanley Hauerwas is the most important theologian writing today.

I confess: If it wasn’t for Rudolf Bultmann I probably wouldn’t be studying theology.

I confess: Even though my family worships at a Mennonite church, I believe in the centrality of the Eucharist.

H/T Thomas

In my opinion, Rudolf Bultmann is perhaps the most misunderstood theologian. I’ve heard him referred to as a “liberal Protestant,” an “existentialist,” and a “neo-orthodox.” His relationship to liberal theology, Barth, Heidegger, not to mention his demythologizing project, are among the many topics that are constantly misrepresented or just plain misunderstood.

In your opinion, who is the most misunderstood theologian?

As my few faithful readers may have noticed, I have recently developed a serious theological crush on the Anglican Archbishop of Canterbury, Rowan Williams. Earlier this year, I had a crush on the late English Dominican Herbert McCabe and last year I was “totally into” John Zizioulas. I know that I am not the only one who develops crushes on theologians. So, let’s have it, who is your latest crush? Don’t be shy, c’mon, let’s hear it. Note: it doesn’t have to be strictly theologians, but let’s stick to authors. 

I’ll blame Halden for introducing me to the awful blog Parchment and Pen where I found this utterly stupid and unhelpful diagram.

What the hell is this? If D. A. Carson lies at the heart of a truly orthodox Christianity I give up.

About a year ago a man walked up to me in the parking lot of a grocery store and asked me if I knew whether I was saved. I thought about it for a second and responded, “Well, no, I don’t think I really have much choice in the matter.” He, of course, reminded me that I do in fact have a choice in the matter, so he handed me a tract with a prayer on it. He informed me that if I say this prayer I will know that I will be saved from the pit of hell. I told him that I wasn’t so sure that we could decide such matters, and that it is more likely that God makes these decisions.

A friend sent me this. Wow! This is serious. Don’t laugh. My 1 1/2 year old son, Owen, began to whimper when he saw this.  

For more hysterically funny cartoons like this one, check out Andy Singer’s site.